There will be those days when you look at your blog, and with a quickness, you shut that tab DOWN. You walk away from your computer, look at it sideways, and find recluse in whatever distracting task you can possibly get your hands on as quick as possible.
Yes, you’ve set goals. Yes, you feel as if your readers are virtually giving you the side eye, because the only thing jumping on your site these days is crickets, but you don’t care about any of that because dagnabbit, you just don’t feel like writing a damn thing.
I feel you my sisters (and brothers). There have been many times when I didn’t feel like writing. Didn’t even want to THINK about writing, and I’d be lying if I said I forced myself to do it anyway. In most cases I didn’t.
But in the good name of all that is delightful, and the shit parade that is about to become a barrage of “New Years Resolution” themed-posts, I wanted you to be prepared.
Introducing, my tips for what to do when you don’t feel like writing a damn thing.
It’s been months since I’ve written, and weeks of internal debate with myself to figure out how I wanted to write this post.
I always try to bring value and optimism to the table in some way. I’d tried to write this once before with the chipper, “Hey, I’ve been going through some things, but all is well now!” slant.
In the end, I scribbled this out on two sheets of white, legal paper.
It felt more real that way.
Let me get this out of the way first: I am NOT ready to get married yet.
I don’t know if I want kids.
Sometimes I think I’d prefer the ring over the husband.
I’m open to the idea that I might “change my mind about all of this in a bit,” but right now, I’m good!
Previously, when I have drifted away from my normal subject matter of life and freedom towards the rocky road of writing about relationship stuff, my posts have been directed at just the ladies.
But can I just say out loud that I don’t care if you are rocking a set of testes or a pair of ovaries, thinking about all of that “LIFE” stuff is kinda scary?
Guys, today, just for me, can you step up and say that despite your lack of biological clock, this LIFE shit gets scary to you too?
Okay, phew. Thanks. Continuing on…
I don’t write about love.
Lost love. Love lost, or anything of that sort.
I write about career stuff. I write about fears, hopes, dreams, and job dissatisfaction. I write about redefining narrow views of success and happiness. I write about challenging the status quo. I deal more with the relationships we have with ourselves, versus the relationships we have with other people.
It’s just never been my thing.
Whenever I get ready to pen a new post, I hear the words of author Terry McMillan in my head: “Write hard and from the heart.”
But over the last few weeks, I haven’t wanted to write from my heart because my heart is injured right now. It’s hurt and it misses someone. My heart has wanted to listen to sad songs, and cry. It hasn’t felt like masking that pain in order to write about job dissatisfaction, or career angst.
My heart wants to write about love and loss. So, bare with me.
Back in the day, people kept their side hustle a secret. In fact, the word “hustle” seemed to be a bad word that was reserved for select groups of people (usually with a negative connotation). Now, everyone has a side gig.
Hustling has become the new black.
No doubt, the effed up economy had something to do with the hustle coming in vogue. Gone are the days when you could kick back and dream about your ultimate job while slaving away at your 9-5. Burning the midnight oil on your side gig has become the norm.
Now it is way more acceptable to:
1. Let people know you have a gig on the side (Everyone is a potential customer!)
2. End convo’s with your friend by saying, “Go on girl! Get your hustle on!”
3. Expect everyone to tell you they are a chef/massue/ writer/martial artist
The last point is what I want to hit on. We live in a slash culture. People are rambling off 5 or more things that they are doing, but unless your name is Diddy (which means you really have a ton of other people doing the heavy lifting for your anyways) it is impossible for you to give all of your best time and effort to five different things.