Tag: on your terms

The Art Of The Focused Hustle

Back in the day, people kept their side hustle a secret. In fact, the word “hustle”  seemed to be a bad word that was reserved for select groups of people (usually with a negative connotation). Now, everyone has a side gig.

Hustling has become the new black.

No doubt, the effed up economy had something to do with the hustle coming in vogue. Gone are the days when you could kick back and dream about your ultimate job while slaving away at your 9-5. Burning the midnight oil on your side gig has become the norm.

Now it is way more acceptable to:

1. Let people know you have a gig on the side (Everyone is a potential customer!)
2. End convo’s with your friend by saying, “Go on girl! Get your hustle on!”
3. Expect everyone to tell you they are a chef/massue/ writer/martial artist

The last point is what I want to hit on. We live in a slash culture. People are rambling off 5 or more things that they are doing, but unless your name is Diddy (which means you really have a ton of other people doing the heavy lifting for your anyways)  it is impossible for you to give all of your best time and effort to five different things.

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3 Reasons Why I Left My “Cool” Job

I have wanted to write this post for weeks. I knew that I need to address the subject here because it is so central to what I write about. I aim to shed light on bold ideas that inspire you all to really think about the life you want to create for yourself. So here is my latest bold idea: No matter how “cool” a job sounds out loud, it’s possible for you to feel unhappy on the inside. As the months have tumbled on, I felt increasingly despondent and depressed about my 9-5. Sure, there were a lot of cool aspects to it (the free stuff, the celebs, the fun events), but the days I struggled to get out of bed out numbered the days I got up with a smile. I felt as if I was getting lost in the shuffle of misery.

So I decided to leave.

It obviously wasn’t as simple as that, and I do plan on writing another post about the thought process I used to make a change, but right now I want to focus on the top three reasons I decided to leave the 9-5 hustle in pursuit of points and places unknown.

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Don’t Be Afraid To F* Up

Most people (myself included) got the message in elementary school that making mistakes is a bad thing. We were taught to memorize facts and figures, and that only bad things come out of making mistakes (bad grades, failure in life, ect).

But this wasn’t always the case.

In fact, during our formative years, our parents encouraged us to make mistakes galore! We fell down many times before we learned to walk and we made garbled sounds before we said anything audible. We tried, and failed until one day we succeeded.

The fear of making mistakes paralyzes us into living lives that look nothing like the ones we have imagined for ourselves in our heads. It’s at best, a shoddy representation of the desires we have in our heart. We plug away at things we don’t care about because we are afraid that if we go after what we really want, we will fall flat on our face. No one likes falling in public.

But the beauty of life is in the mistakes that we make. Because mistakes are lessons waiting to be learned, and harvested, and turned into a better model of what we were trying to achieve before we fell short.

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Stop Seeking Approval to Live the Life You Want

 

The list of complaints about Generation Y is miles long.  We are lazy. We’re entitled brats who don’t know what it means to work hard for a buck. We’re whiny. We’ve heard it all before.

But we know the truth.

What they don’t know is that  more than anything we want to look like we have life all figured out. We want to look like we are mastering our universe. Monday through Friday, many of us pimp ourselves out in button-down shirts and polyester pants to head to jobs that have us  living paycheck-to-paycheck because we are hesitant to admit we are scared.

We aren’t afraid of getting our lights cut off. Making credit card payments late is unpleasant, but we don’t fear that.  We aren’t terrified of eating MSG-ladden Ramen Noodles for a few more years.

Nope. What are we most afraid of?

Disapproval.

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Just Try It!

I like to create lists. Lists of things “to-do”, lists of books I want “to-read” and lists of all the things I want to accomplish in life. The first two lists are rather simple to create, but the third list, my list of wanna be accomplishments, is so intimidating. Even to the creator(me).

I’m intimidated, and even a little scared, by all of the choices I feel I need to make. I can indecisive sometimes. I’m one of those people who wants to try it all. So instead of trying one thing at a time, I sometimes neglect to make a concrete decision. I walk away from my list. Not quite content with how I am spending my time, but afraid to shake things up because I feel like I don’t know where to start.

I explained this sentiment recently to Jonathan Fields, author of the amazing book and blog, Career Renegade. I met him at a book signing for The Art of Non Conformity by Chris Guillebeau.  I told him that I am interested in so many things that I just don’t know where to begin, or even end. He smiled at me and then he said: “Just do something”.  I said, “Oh.”

It was a simple answer, and probably not the one I was originally looking for, but it was one piece of advice I have decided to take.  For me, just do something has morphed into my new motto: “Just try something”.

This blog is one of things I decided to “just try”.  When I get stuck, or when I feel like my schedule is overwhelming, I flash back to the night I officially launched this blog. I didn’t have the Internet at my house, so I stayed at work until 3 a.m. writing and planning. By the end of that session I was blurry-eyed, and nodding off at my desk, but I was so excited. I was thrilled to finally do something I said I wanted to do, and I was happy because it was the first time I’ve felt passionate  about what I was writing  in a long time.

I also remind myself of the “just try something” motto when I am feeling career angst-y. You know what I am talking about. Those moments when you get so frustrated with yourself because you just don’t know what you want to do.

I never aim to portray myself as an expert of anything but my own experience( and I’m still trying to figure that out), but I do know one thing: you will never wake up in the morning and suddenly know what you want to do with the rest of your life. I truly don’t believe it will happen that way. The best thing to hope for is to wake up with an idea for a new thing to try. And when you think about it, that is way more exciting. Who wants to do the same thing for the next thirty years or so?  Even Oprah has gone through many revolutions.

The only way to know what you do, or don’t want to do, is to just try something. The best way to get unstuck is to move forward. Even if it is a baby step.  Don’t be too afraid to make mistakes. You can always try something else.  Who knows when you might stumble upon something that makes your heart soar, you mind leap, and your eyes large with wonder?

What are three things you would like to “just try?”